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It’s here! My new podcast, Deep Dive is live. Follow @deepdivepodcast for new episodes. Link in my bio to listen on iTunes (other platforms coming soon). I can’t believe I finally put this out into the world. Thank you all for your patience and support. . In this introductory episode, I discuss my own personal struggles and evolution with self-worth, beauty standards, shame, disordered eating and more. I also share the story of my journey into yoga and ultimately self-healing and liberation. . Please listen, subscribe, and leave a review if you feel inclined!
These women are my team. My family, my support, my cheerleaders. These two women are behind most of the content you see here. They’re behind lots of content you haven’t seen yet. No doubt I would not be where I am, as I am, without them. We have all helped each other grow and we are growing together. Stronger together. Michele is one of the hardest workers I know. She gets shit done, delivers excellence, and has a true vision for supporting women and femmes in their work. Cheyenne is another powerhouse. She shoots boudoir redefined for women and femmes and gives every client an unforgettable experience of growth that goes far beyond photos. We work hard, we give our energy from a place of true care, we hold space together and we take care of each other all the while. I am so grateful for these strong women and the many others in my life. @onlo_beauty on me + Michele. @anna_sky_beauty on Cheyenne. My lingerie is @elomilingerie.
Identifying as a woman feels very empowering to me now, but hasn’t been easy to navigate. Growing up my body changed quickly and I had full breasts and hips and curves by the time I was 12. I felt ashamed in my body. I was bigger than my friends, couldn’t shop where I wanted, and felt like I stood out everywhere I went. I was treated differently. At the same time, I was sexualized by men, and by society, for looking the way I did. . As I got older and my body continued to change through years of awful dieting and self loathing and disordered eating and a whole slew of coping mechanisms, it became increasingly difficult for me to identify as a woman and understand where I really fit in as one who didn’t fit all patriarchal and Eurocentric beauty standards. Now that I have come home to myself and learned to embody all of who I am, I own my power. As a human, as one who deals with all the bullshit that comes along with the perceived identity of woman and a fat woman. . I am powerful. I am a force. I have the universe within me. I have my own light. I have survived. And I am thriving, knowing that all systems in place to stop me and all labels to strip me of my worth are also my power. I have the privilege to exist with a lot of autonomy and I will use it. Without those systems, I may have never found the motivation to seek myself out, to be my own person, to exist beyond the noise. To yell a big fuck off to all forms of control in place to keep women and femmes powerless. . I am big and I love it, I take up space, I make myself known, I know my worth, and I don’t care if they don’t see it, if they don’t like how much space I take up, don’t care if they think I’m unhealthy, if they think I’m too naked, too liberated, if they don’t like my body. I am here to stay. Talk to the hip ✋🏼🍗 . 📷 @quartermoonco. 💋 @onlo_beauty.
There’s a difference between hate/intolerance and constructive criticism. No more conversations shut down under the guise of love and light, please. No conversation silenced because money talks louder than our own voices - those who have it know that and use it to their advantage. Spiritual bypass ain’t cool. Commodified wellness that doesn’t encourage wellness for all ain’t cool. ALSO self love is not an excuse to shut your ears or mind. Love yourself and check yourself. Put love and light into the world and call out bullshit when you see it. We can do both. What’s bugging you?
The glow up is underway my friends. In the studio today writing some essays about the importance of self-awareness as a route to autonomy, and the commodification of self-care and wellness. Let’s get it poppin’.